Relationships
Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson This is a well researched and very readable book, equally suitable for individuals and couples. It explains attachment theory through the lens of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy. It focuses on what we want and need and how we act (or react) when we get it vs. when we don’t.
Not Just Friends by Shirley Glass, Ph.D. A very readable and practical guide to “ensure safe relationships and secure marriages by exploring the vulnerabilities in your relationship and any outside influences that may put it at risk.” Another quote from the back of the book says it “puts a new face on infidelity”.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? by Lee Raffel,M.S.W. This is a practical, hands-on guide to making an informed decision about whether or not to separate and explores the implications of each choice.
Communication
The Fine Art of Small Talk by Debra Fine The author started life as a shy and introverted science geek. She used her research skills (with herself as the subject) and showed that even if you’re not a born extrovert you can L-E-A-R-N social skills. She is now a nationally-recognized speaker on this topic.
The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman There are parts of this book I don’t love, but the overall concept is very useful. Read the Table of Contents to get the overview. Hurt and conflict is often due to missed signals. One person offers acts of service as an expression of love when the other is looking for quality time while yet another yearns for words of affirmation or touch.
Nonviolent Communication, A Language of Life by Marshall Rosenberg, Ph.D This book is the “gold standard” of skillful communication. It teaches how to have more satisfying and rewarding relationships using effective language skills. Move beyond power struggles and discouraging interaction patterns that keep you stuck and disappointed and towards enriching, meaningful connection.
Moods: Anxiety and Depression
The Bipolar Disorder Survival Guide by David Miklowitz, Ph.D This book is for the family as well as the person being diagnosed. It’s packed with information and guidance such as understanding the diagnosis, recognizing early warning signs and working with medications and doctors.
The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook by Davis, Eshelman and McKay Includes directions for thought stopping and worry control. breathing and meditation, visualization, time management and more.
Mind/Body/Brain
The Brain That Changes Itself by Norman Doidge, M.D. Brain research is a new frontier, exploding with new information. The brain can and does change throughout life. This is called neuroplasticity. Our thoughts change the structure and organization of the brain. Read Chapter Six for information on OCD. This is helpful to read in conjunction with Brainspotting as a way to reduce stuck thoughts. Exciting and hopeful!
Start Where You Are by Pema Chodron Cognitive Behavioral Therapy has a lot in common with mindfulness / meditation. Both use the power of thought and mind to change the way we feel. Pema Chodron is a beloved and compassionate Teacher.
Wherever You Go, There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn. The author is a Westerner, generally credited with bringing Eastern ideas and philosophy to the Western world. This book is a series of short chapters. It’s readable and accessible while also being intensely thought-provoking and revealing. Pick it up anywhere and dive into the world of using mindfulness to lower stress and bring more balance into everyday life. This book is your friend and it’s only a breath away.